Monday, December 19, 2011

Lights Out for Pittsburgh - and Candlestick

Cletus and Jim-Bob try to call their friends back
home at Buffalo Wild Wings to find out what happened.
It was the best of times (a comprehensive thrashing of the Steelers) and the worst of times (two embarrassing power outages at decrepit Candlestick Park).

Congrats to the 49ers, and a big "F You" to the mouth-breathing, bandwagon-jumping Steelers fans who flooded Twitter and the blogosphere with their classless comments about "what happens in the dark" in San Francisco.

What happens is this: you fly out here on a Southwest Airlines non-refundable "want to get away" discount fare, spend all of your holiday money stuffing fresh crab down your gullets at Fishermen's Wharf, enjoy beautiful blue skies in December and GET YOUR ASSES KICKED. Then, you go back home to a long Pennsylvania winter.

Enjoy.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Off-Topic: College Football, the Big East and the Aztecs

Times Square welcomes the
San Diego State Aztecs to the Big East.
I figure that, after over a year of posting about the Niners, I'm entitled to at least one off-topic post. This is it...

Listening to the local sports talk yahoos this morning ripping on the fact that college bowl season starts this weekend with offerings like the New Mexico Bowl and the Famous Idaho Potato Bowl got me fired up. If you don't want to watch the damned games, then don't. It's a free country, and everybody has a remote control for their TV.

But I know that I'll be doing everything I can to watch every snap of the New Orleans Bowl, even though I've probably never watched a single play from any of the previous incarnations of this game. Why? Because San Diego State is playing in this game, and this is about as good as it gets for the Aztecs' football program since I graduated from that school in 1992.

Am I happy about this? About settling for bowl games that occur over a week before Christmas? Hell no. And neither is SDSU. After decades of having every attempt at improving their programs thwarted by their neighbors to the north (in order to protect what USC and UCLA perceive to be their fertile recruiting grounds), the Aztecs have decided to join the Big East for football to finally grab a seat at the BCS table.

Will it work? I don't know. There's a good chance that conference alignments and their BCS automatic bids will have changed so much by 2013 that the Aztecs will never play a Big East game. Plus, the football-only move has required the rest of the sports to leave the Mountain West Conference and step down to the Big West Conference (yes, the Aztecs will be members of both the Big East and Big West conferences -go figure).

But now, the Aztecs finally have their foot in the door. And it's about time. Ever since USC prevented SDSU from joining the Pac 8 when it expanded to 10 teams back in the '70s, the Aztecs have been playing with the deck stacked against them.

As SDSU wallowed through the muck and mire of the WAC and Mountain West conferences, schools like USC and Texas grabbed blue-chip recruits like Reggie Bush and Ricky Williams (who both played high school ball less than a ten-minute drive from the SDSU campus), while SDSU had to search high and low to find whatever they could. SDSU had to go all the way out to Lousiana to recruit the greatest Aztec* of them all, Marshall Faulk, and even then, it was only the guarantee of letting him be a running back (as opposed to being converted to a defensive back) that brought #28 to Montezuma Mesa.

So for all of you pompous and arrogant jackasses chortling about how ridiculous it is for teams like SDSU and Boise State to now be playing football in the Big East, SCREW YOU. We've been kicked and beaten down long enough, and now we finally have an invitation to your party. And if I were you, I'd be a little bit scared. Despite never having a decent conference affiliation or big TV contract, we've managed to build a state-of-the-art on-campus arena and sporting complex that regularly hosts NCAA tournament games. Our men's hoops team, in a rebuilding year, is knocking on the door of the top 25 (with 9 straight wins against Pac 12 opponents) while playing in front of one of the best student sections in the nation.

And by the way, did I mention this all takes place in SAN DIEGO? If I'm an 18-year-old blue-chipper and I have my choice of, say, Norman (that's in Oklahoma, from what I've been told) or San Diego with the same prospects of playing for a BCS bid, I'm picking the city that has beaches and sunshine. And that's the dirty little secret that the Pac 12, Big 12, Big 10, SEC, etc. have tried to keep by knocking SDSU down every time they've picked themselves up from the mat after another major conference beatdown.

Now, SDSU will finally have some money and a major conference affiliation. The sleeping giant has awoken.

Aztec for Life.

*Okay, it's a toss-up between Marshall and Tony Gwynn.

Monday, December 12, 2011

It's Never Easy in Arizona

Yesterday was "Turn Back the Clock" day. To 2010.
It's never easy in Arizona for the 49ers. Yesterday's 21-19 loss to the Cardinals was a culmination of missed opportunities by the offense, too many big plays given up by the defense and one momentum-killing screwup by the officiating crew that resulted in a 14-point swing on the scoreboard.

Heading into next Monday's showdown with the Steelers, the 49ers now find themselves in a dogfight with the Saints for the NFC's #2 seed. At stake is a bye week during the first round of the playoffs and home field advantage during the divisional round, which the 49ers will desperately need to have a decent chance at defeating New Orleans in the postseason before traveling to Green Bay.

So, Wha' Happened on Sunday? Three things, and then some perspective:

1. The offense stunk in the red zone. We've known this most of the season (which is why David Akers is on pace to obliterate the single-season mark for most field goals). The 49ers haven't found a single go-to playmaker when they get inside the 10 yard line as previous red zone performers like Vernon Davis and Braylon Edwards (prior to joining the 49ers) have failed to produce when it matters most. And the running game has been virtually nonexistent in these types of situations (running Frank Gore on 2nd-and-goal = 100% failure).

If the 49ers are going to be successful in the postseason, they'll have to find a way to punch the ball into the end zone. There is no way the defense can contain the Saints' and Packers' high-octane offenses enough to settle for field goals. If things don't improve, I can easily see the Niners in a 14-6 hole after two possessions against the Saints in their first playoff game since the '02 season.

2. The defense missed their best player. I don't know how long Patrick Willis is going to be sidelined with his hamstring injury, but it's not a coincidence that the 49ers surrendered the most big plays in a game since the OT loss to the Cowboys while their best player was in street clothes. For a team that relies on field position, special teams and defensive dominance to win, Willis is clearly the MVP.

Hopefully, Willis will return to the lineup soon to patrol the middle of the field while wreaking havoc on opposing ballcarriers. Without his presence, the defensive unit just looks a little lost.

3. The officiating crew really, really, REALLY hosed the 49ers when they bungled replay challenge prior to the 49ers' third field goal attempt. 

We all know the story, so I won't bore you with the details. But somebody needs to explain why coaches and officials are allowed to wait until the last possible millisecond to throw their red flags and stop gameplay. If you can't figure out if you should challenge the preceding play before the offense gets into their set positions, you probably need to find another line of work.

In this instance, the officials waited until AFTER the ball was snapped to blow the play dead. Unfortunately, by that point, the 49ers had already unveiled their surprise fake field goal attempt (which would have likely resulted in a highlight-reel touchdown for Jonathan Goodwin). When the crew reviewed Ken Whisenhut's hairbrained challenge of Kyle Williams' third-down catch (which couldn't be reviewed because of a glitch in the replay system - go figure), the air had already been taken out of the Niners' sails.

You knew what was coming next. Akers misses the 50-yard attempt and the Cardinals, with decent field position for the first time all afternoon, were in the end zone less than a minute later. That, ladies and gentlemen, is what we like to call The 14-Point Swing, courtesy of the officials' incompetence. How Jim Harbaugh managed to stay on the sidelines without putting a choke hold on anybody from Al Riveron's crew demonstrates that the guy has a great deal of self-control during the heat of battle.

So what does it all mean? The Twitterverse declared the 49ers season over following the game, and this morning's newspaper columns are littered with observations about the team's lack of improvement and diminished efficiency on offense.

Look, here's the deal - the Niners weren't very good yesterday and they lost by 2 points on the road against a surging divisional opponent (the Cardinals' only loss during their last six games was in San Francisco). It's difficult to win on the road. Just ask New Orleans and Baltimore, who were boat-raced in St. Louis and Seattle earlier this year. Hell, the Saints barely escaped Tennessee with a win yesterday during a game that went down to the final minute. Shit happens - that's why no team has run the tables since the insufferable Dolphins in 1972. RELAX, people.

Yes, the offense has to figure out a way to score touchdowns instead of field goals, or this will be a very short playoff run in January. That will undoubtedly be Harbaugh's top priority heading into the final stretch. But Willis will be back and the fake field goal fiasco was an anomaly. The Niners still have complete control of their playoff positioning as the #2 seed.

Jim Harbaugh and his squad will determine if yesterday's game will either be remembered as the day the 2011 season fell apart or forgotten as an insignificant bump in the road during the 49ers' return to the league's upper echelon. Next Monday, they can take a giant step towards the latter by crushing the Steelers at home in front of a national audience.

My money's on Harbaugh. I've learned my lesson.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Reason #572 I'm Glad I'm Not Going to Games

Don't be like these idiots.
The Wave.

C'mon Niner fans - you should know better. That was absolutely embarrassing.

Back in the '80s, when doing stupid stuff like The Wave was popular, 49er fans would not stand for that nonsense. People even brought "No Wave" signs to games at Candlestick. The only time the words "wave" and "Candlestick" will ever belong together is when we finally get to wave good-bye to that decrepit old stadium.

If this is what happens when the 49ers win the NFC West, I'd hate to think what we're in for during the postseason.

I bet the mouth-breathers in Niner Noise were the morons that started The Wave on Sunday.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Dear NFL: Thanks for Nothing

The Niners' new stadium, courtesy of everybody
except the NFL.

Update: the NFL is chipping in $150 million. Not exactly chump change, but far less than what the Niners were likely expecting...and deserve.

The good news: the 49ers and the city of Santa Clara announced that they have secured all of the funds needed for the construction of the new stadium.

The bad news: apparently, the league is contributing a grand total of ZERO dollars to this project.

Look, I can understand the NFL's reluctance to give the 49ers the usual financial assistance if they weren't going to share a stadium with the Raiders. But refusing to give a single dime to the 49ers tells me once again that this team is not a priority to a league that rarely recognizes anything that happens west of the Mississippi.

Kudos to Lil' Jed and the rest of the organization for working with Santa Clara, B of A, US Bank and Goldman Sachs for getting the rest of the money needed for the stadium, and shame on the NFL for keeping their wallets tightly closed when one of their oldest franchises asked for a little help.

My only concern with this deal is that, since the NFL doesn't have a large financial stake in this stadium venture, they won't be motivated to have Santa Clara and the 49ers host any future Super Bowls. And from what I've seen from the way the league treats the 49ers organization over the past decade or so, that wouldn't be much of a stretch.